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Talking It Over

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"Talking It Over" is the story of three Londoners: one woman, two men, all near the age of thirty (give or take a few years), who, despite their basic differences - Gillian is reserved, Stuart is a bit pedantic, Oliver leans toward flamboyance - mark the three corners of an orderly triangle: Gillian and Stuart have just been married, Stuart and Oliver are longtime friends, Oliver and Gillian get along fine. Straightforward and simple. Everyone in their places, getting along, going along...

Until everything goes wrong.

When it does, Gillian, Stuart and Oliver decide that it's time to talk it all over. Because although they'd all agree that the orderliness of their lives has suddenly mutated into chaos - the alarming fluctuations of love being the chief culprit - that's about all they'd agree on ("One bit of information and people are immediately off into their theories," says Stuart, a bit pedantically). And each of them is determined to be heard.

What we hear are three wonderfully realized voices telling three wildly different versions of one story - presenting the protean facts of disintegrating and escalating affections, laying blame, taking blame, talking about themselves, about each other, across each other, behind each other's backs, all in an attempt to get at the endlessly elusive truth. And what they reveal is the sometimes hilarious, sometimes heartrending process of selective memory that deeply colors the (more or less) fine art of eyewitnessing.

Once again, the brilliant author of "Flaubert's Parrot", "Staring at the Sun" and "A History of the World in 10-and-1/2 Chapters" gives us a dazzling work of imagination: witty, wry, playful and, in the end, honed to a razor-sharp emotional edge.

275 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1991

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About the author

Julian Barnes

160 books6,452 followers
Julian Patrick Barnes is an English writer. He won the Man Booker Prize in 2011 with The Sense of an Ending, having been shortlisted three times previously with Flaubert's Parrot, England, England, and Arthur & George. Barnes has also written crime fiction under the pseudonym Dan Kavanagh (having married Pat Kavanagh). In addition to novels, Barnes has published collections of essays and short stories.
In 2004 he became a Commandeur of L'Ordre des Arts et des Lettres. His honours also include the Somerset Maugham Award and the Geoffrey Faber Memorial Prize. He was awarded the 2021 Jerusalem Prize.

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5 stars
1,277 (19%)
4 stars
2,639 (41%)
3 stars
1,906 (29%)
2 stars
470 (7%)
1 star
109 (1%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 476 reviews
February 9, 2017
Barnes is able to take what seems to be a fairly ordinary story and extract from it the nuances of character and plot that involve you as if you were watching a BBC series about unfaithfulness, mid-life crises and the consequent despair. All set among the middle classes in some rather nicely-decorated homes. If Barnes works for you it is because you become involved with his characters on quite a deep and personal level. You might not be able to identify with them exactly, but you can with their situations and existential angst.

This wouldn't have won the Booker Prize as The Sense of an Ending deservedly did, but it is brilliantly written and a very good read.

Read 2013, reviewed 2016.
Profile Image for Cecily.
1,231 reviews4,804 followers
March 24, 2024
This reads like the script of a talking-heads adaptation of an Iris Murdoch novel.

The main characters are friendless and damaged, but intriguing, and there’s a Svengali-figure manipulating things. It’s broadly chronological, with protagonists taking turns to give their account of the next bit of the story - which often differs subtly but significantly from how the others describe it. They know the others are also talking to the reader (viewer?), but don’t know exactly what they’ve said.
Memory is an act of will, and so is forgetting.

Name and pronoun changes (including debate of singular “they”, in 1991), forgetfulness and deliberate deception (they all withhold vital information), the metaphors of picture restoration (you can uncover secrets, but reversibility matters too), wearing (and not wearing) make-up, coupled with different narrators, create an intriguing, tangled, and often contradictory story.

Whose narrative would you trust the most?
Stuart: “I remember everything.
Gillian: “Just because I don’t have a confessional nature doesn’t mean I forget things.
Oliver: “I remember all the important things.

It’s a triangle from the start, so aspects of the plot are obvious - jealousy and guilt, especially - muddied as they shift roles.


Image: Karpman’s Drama Triangle of Persecutor, Rescuer, and Victim (Source)

There is occasional input from a few peripheral characters, but it’s mainly Stuart, Gillian, and Oliver’s story, told by them. Oliver is insufferable, with something of Boris Johnson’s style of pompous, esoteric, demeaning, buffoonery: “Gillian’s rebarbative quotidian motor-car” is typical.

The portrayal of the fear of AIDS is, thankfully, rather dated, but it’s an enjoyable read about largely unlikeable people, with an ending that went in slightly unexpected directions. In Oscar Wilde’s The Importance of Being Earnest (see my review HERE), Miss Prism famously tells Cecily: “The good ended happily, and the bad unhappily. That is what Fiction means.” Miss Prism might be shocked by aspects of this story, and I’m not sure she’d class it as fiction.

Quotes

• “There’s no ‘real’ picture under there waiting to be revealed.”
• “The only Darling I can trust is a Darling I’ve paid for.”
• “I’ve gone away, they’ve gone away, but it’s not over.”
• “You can’t just ‘be happy’; you have to manage happiness.”
• “Love is just a system for getting someone to call you Darling after sex.”

See also

• I’ve reviewed a few Barnes books, HERE.
• I’ve reviewed more than a dozen Iris Murdoch novels, HERE.
Alan Bennett is the master of the Talking Heads format, though usually just one person's viewpoint. See my review HERE.

Reading friends' reviews of this, I discover there's a sequel, Love, etc, but I'm unsure about whether to seek it out or not. I think I prefer to leave things as they are - and I'm not sure I have the stomach for more of Oliver.
Profile Image for Paul Bryant.
2,329 reviews11.3k followers
May 8, 2011
The problem is that one third of this novel is spoken by Oliver, who talks like the cheese shop customer in the Monty Python sketch :

I was sitting in the public library on Thurmon Street just now, skimming through "Rogue Herries" by Hugh Walpole, and I suddenly came over all peckish. And I thought to myself, "a little fermented curd will do the trick," so, I curtailed my Walpoling activites, sallied forth, and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy comestibles!

And this is Julian Barnes' Oliver :

Things were just a touch grim at the Shakespeare School
before it occluded its portals for the vacation. A certain
crepuscularity of spirit had sauntered in, courtesy of a mis-
understanding which I hadn't bothered to trouble the prancing
Squire and his Milady with.


Oliver is so extraordinarily grating that it's hard to imagine anyone volunteering to be in the same room with him, never mind being his friend, never mind wanting to shag him. He talks like a caricature of a highly strung gay man from the 1960s. Incessantly. I couldn't believe in the central friendship between him and dull banker Stuart and I couldn't believe that the charming but also fairly dull Gillian would want to bother with either and when we get to her so very metaphorical day job of picture restoration with its essential "reversability" I think that this book is actually a cartoon which is trying to grow up to become a novel, but can't...quite...make it.
Profile Image for Karen·.
667 reviews874 followers
Read
November 16, 2014
Him, and me, and her.
Me. And him. And her.
Him and me, and him.

Her and me, and him.
Me, and him and her.
Him and him and me.

Us and him.
Me and her and him.
Him and me, and me and him.

Them and me.
Me and her, and him.
Me and him. And him.

Punctuation, and Pronouns are Important, we are taught that early on in the novel. These characters rarely say you. They are talking it over, yes, but not with each other. Each one talks out to, to, to..... well, me. The Reader. The Audience. Each has his or her (cumbersome!) own version of what happened. And each warns us at the beginning: Stuart remembers everything, Oliver only remembers the important stuff and Gillian doesn't really want to remember at all.

English as a Second Language used to be called something else:
EFL, by the way. Nobody sees the joke. English as a Foreign Language. No? Let me put it into a sentence: 'I'm teaching English as a Foreign Language.' Look, the point is, if that's how it's being taught, it's not surprising that most of our alumni can't buy a bus-ticket to Bayswater. Why don't they teach English as English, that's what I want to know.

That is a perfect illustration of how irritating Oliver can be. I was already laughing at I'm teaching English as a Foreign Language, but then he has to bang on and stick it in your face. Talking of which, I was laughing again a bit later when I discovered that Oliver, for all his brash bright breezy 'intelligence' doesn't know what a Glasgow Kiss is.
Ha.
Profile Image for JimZ.
1,180 reviews635 followers
February 13, 2022
I did not like this book.

I felt it was pretentious. It was supposed to be believable and humorous, and to my mind, it was not believable and after a while lost its humor. Somewhere after reading 100 pages, I was longer reading what the characters were thinking, saying, or doing — I was reading what Julian Barnes was putting into their minds, mouths, or actions. After about 170 pages I couldn’t take it anymore and took to skimming. I cannot recommend this book. Four months ago I read “The Sense of an Ending” by the same author and loved it...a 5-star read.

Reviews:
• Well Josephine Humphreys liked it lots... https://www.nytimes.com/1991/10/13/bo...
https://www.nybooks.com/articles/1991...

Note: Love, etc. was written by Barnes 9 years later and is a continuation of this story. I am not sure I am going to delve into that one....
Profile Image for Bianca.
1,201 reviews1,055 followers
July 26, 2018
My Julian Barnes bingeing continues and it's still as satisfying as the first bitebook.

What a nice surprise to come across some old friends, the threesome made up of Gillian, Stuart and Oliver, whom I first met in Love, etc., which I listened to a couple of weeks ago. Even better, this book was beautifully narrated by the same extraordinary actors, Steven Pacey, Alex Jennings, Clare Higgins. You see, when I requested this audiobook, I had no idea what it was about.

Despite the fact that the characters and the plot were very familiar, I still enjoyed listening to the three of them bickering, interacting, reminiscing and having their different takes on what had happened. This novel focuses more on the beginning of Gillian's relationship with Stuart, followed by their divorce so that Gillian could marry Oliver, Stuart's best friend.

Again, the narration is absolutely divine, as the three characters are talking directly to us, in some ways pleading their case. I liked Gillian, despite the fact that she'd left the reliable, nice guy, albeit a bit boring, Stuart, for the good-looking charmer, with no substance or work ethic, Oliver.

Julian Barnes is a great observer of people. His intelligence and erudition are more than apparent. His command of the English language is astonishing. I feel smarter just by paying attention to his words. Being entertained and touched by his books is just a bonus.

Again, I take a bow.
Profile Image for PopiTonja.
118 reviews11 followers
January 5, 2024
Jedna potpuno luda trač partija, genijalno napisana.
Ne sećam se da sam imala prilike da čitam nesto slično. Glavni junaci se obraćaju meni, baš meni i imam utisak ako skrenem pogled da će me uhvatiti za rukav i reći: ej, tebi pričam, nema sad vrdanja, u ovome si koliko i mi. (Često upravo tako i komuniciraju, pa zato i taj osećaj prisutnosti njihovom ispovedanju)
Neverovatan osećaj, posebno kada istu priču i dogođaj prepričavaju svako na svoj način.
Ona izmedju dve vatre, opravdana, neopravdana trojka. Šta je ispravno a šta nije... zagarantovana zabava na stranicama.
Uhvatim sebe da razmišljam po kome ću, ko je izvukao deblji kraj.. i ne znam, znam samo da je sve zapravo tako, sušta realnost današnjice.
Ne znam da li bih baš mogla da je preporučim svima, Barns se često udaljava od teme (ja to volim), razradi potpuno nevažne stvari pa se vrati, skoro i da ne primetiš.
Meni je genijalna! Uživala sam u svakoj rečenici!
Profile Image for Trevor.
1,397 reviews23.3k followers
May 4, 2011
I hadn't planned to watch the Royal Wedding, but then Paul suggested there might be an anarchist outrage during the ceremony and, well, I couldn't resist. But I've been annoyed ever since.

One of my favourite parts of this book is that one of the characters wants his wedding vows to contain the phrase, "With all my worldly goods I thee endow". It is, admittedly, a beautiful phrase and I can believe a character wanting this included in their vows. So, the Royals being high church and all, I expected they would have this included in their vows. But like all beautiful poetry in the church liturgy this has been destroyed or 'modernised' - it now says something like, "And all my worldly goods I will with you share". This is, obviously not nearly as modern as it ought to be. Why not, "And I'll happily share all my stuff with you".

By the way - I listened to this as an audio book performed (quite literally) by three actors. Probably the best audio book I've ever listened to.

**********************

(Previous review)


Funny, wise, sad - it is pointless me trying to praise this book too highly. If fiction has a role in helping us to understand the nature of love and life and being in the world we inhabit, then this is a book that helps along the way.

His writing is so good, so terribly good. The bit were the two guys are discussing the song 'Three Cigarettes in the Ashtray' still makes me laugh just to think of it.

The sequel - Love, etc - is darker and much more sad, but I challenge you not to read it after reading this one. Go on, see if you can.
Profile Image for Glenn Sumi.
404 reviews1,797 followers
April 16, 2017
Do we really need to read another book about a love triangle? In this case: absolutely. Barnes (Flaubert's Parrot, The Sense Of An Ending), is such a clever, observant and graceful writer that he makes you care about the lives of three typical but oh-so-flawed Londoners: conscientious banker Stuart, unemployed but well-educated Oliver, and Stuart's wife (and the book's least developed character), picture restorer Gillian.

Their first-person voices are vivid and believable. And while there is genuine pain and heartbreak in here, confronted with your typical British stiff upper lip, you can easily file the book under: Comedy of Errors.. and Eros. Oliver's snobbish pronouncements are especially hilarious.

Note: There's a sequel called Love, Etc. (the title refers to one of the more amusing chapters in the book). I'm definitely picking it up later this year.
Profile Image for Nood-Lesse.
370 reviews245 followers
April 20, 2018
E se il denaro può essere paragonato all'amore, be’, allora il matrimonio è il conto

-Il tentativo di creare un personaggio amissiano è fallito miseramente
-L’ironia di Barnes è noiosa o meglio non è ironia
-Barnes travestito da Amis è ridicolo al punto che dovete immaginare questi due uomini con gli abiti scambiati

description

I miei appunti iniziali erano questi, quando ancora non avevo capito che il libro di Barnes è concepito come un palcoscenico dove recitano alternandosi Oliver, Stuart, Gillan e una serie di personaggi minori, loro amici o parenti. Influenzato da ciò che ho letto sull’amicizia fra Barnes ed Amis, ho immaginato che Oliver e Stuart fossero i loro avatar. Dei due l’amissiano saccente, ironicamente goffo, parodia mal riuscita di Richard Tull, è Oliver, l’artistoide perennemente in bolletta. Stuart invece è il bancario per niente precario, noioso quanto basta perché l’amico passi il tempo a sbeffeggiarlo ed invidiarlo. I due oltre all’amicizia si troveranno a condividere Gillan, la donna di cui si innamoreranno in contemporanea. Barnes spingerà la situazione al paradosso, ma lo farà con il preciso scopo di far recitare ai suoi attori monologhi come questi
Con amore, ecc. L’asserto è semplice. Il mondo è diviso in due categorie: quelli che credono che l’amore sia lo scopo, la funzione, il basso continuo, la melodia primaria della vita, e che il resto – tutto il resto – sia niente piú che un ecc.; e gli altri, i moltissimi infelici, adepti precipuamente dell’ecc., per i quali l’amore, ancorché piacevole, è soltanto un effimero fermento giovanile, il querulo e fuggevole preludio all’ora del dovere, ma niente di piú consistente, durevole e affidabile di quanto sia, poniamo, l’arredamento di casa. Questa è la sola distinzione fra le persone che contano.
L’amore agisce sulla base delle leggi di mercato, è un dato di realtà … Spesso la felicità di una persona viene edificata sull’afflizione altrui, è cosí che va il mondo. È dura, lo so…

Dopo le prime trenta pagine non credevo che il romanzo avrebbe avuto le mie tre stelle piene, che sarei riuscito a sopportare Oliver (spero Barnes non cercasse di farlo assomigliare a Lord Henry Wotton… In coda al libro viene scomodato anche Oscar Wilde), che la trama mi avrebbe sorpreso. In realtà la trama sorprende solo perché ad un certo punto è come se venisse sospesa, spezzata, per passare senza nessun rendiconto ad un livello successivo. I personaggi di Barnes parlano d’amore ed evitano accuratamente di parlare di sesso con la formula “non ho intenzione di scendere ai particolari” lo liquidano lasciandolo all'immaginazione del lettore. Si parla di sesso in modo generale, non applicato.
La colonna sonora l’ha scelta Julian Barnes
Patsy Cline-Walkin' After Midnight
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bsRNC...
Profile Image for Tony.
978 reviews1,770 followers
November 15, 2014
The English are a mad and violent race, and their sense of humour is very singular.

So is their self-effacement.

This is the story of a love triangle, with mostly unlikable characters and a plot that's cartoonish. That said, it's still Julian Barnes, and any subject or motif serves as a canvas for his brilliant erudition. Even lesser Barnes is immensely satisfying.

It was like this: The principals and plot twists annoyed me to the point where I could have pitched this half-way through; but if the sequel was sitting nearby - and there is a sequel (Love etc.), though not nearby - I would be reading it right now.
Profile Image for Katya.
373 reviews
Read
June 4, 2023
Sempre pensei que somos como somos e nunca devemos fingir que somos outra coisa. Mas o Oliver costumava corrigir-me, explicando-me que somos o que fingimos ser.

Mesmo sem conhecer a obra de Barnes, arrisco dizer que Amor & C.ª é um romance atípico, uma escolha ousada e, possivelmente, pouco representativa da carreira do escritor. As razões que me levam a meter assim as mãos no fogo são três: tema, personagens, abordagem.

Para começar pelo princípio, calculo que qualquer leitor, logo nas primeiras páginas, tenha uma sensação de déjà vu: o tema do triângulo amoroso grassa a literatura ocidental e extravasa para todas as artes imagináveis, desde O Monte dos Vendavais a Os Sonhadores, passando por Jules e Jim, O Grande Gatsby e milhentos outros; é um tema tão explorado, batido e analisado que a escolha parece demasiado óbvia. Enquanto isso, as personagens pouco agradáveis, algo pedantes e difíceis de entender parecem criar um risco desnecessário para o autor. E finalmente, a abordagem direta que faz dessas personagens, narradoras e autoras da sua própria história, e a forma como coloca o leitor num papel de figura secundária e conivente é de um snobismo alarmante.

Posto tudo isto, devo dizer que Amor & C.ª funcionou para mim! Barnes pegou num tema universal - que talvez nunca se esgote - e rapidamente o levou de uma comédia de costumes a uma profundidade abismal onde os sentimentos roçam a obsessão e o doentio, e onde Stuart, Gillian e Oliver se fazem recetores, emissores e intérpretes de um amor que não passa de ilusão, convenção social, pseudoinstituição alimentada pela hipocrisia...

O amor e o dinheiro são dois grandes hologramas que cintilam à nossa frente, virando-se e contorcendo-se como autênticos corpos tridimensionais. Estendemos o braço e a mão passa através deles, como se não estivessem lá. Soube sempre que o dinheiro é uma invenção e que tem poderes limitados mas maravilhosos. Não sabia que o amor era igual. Não sabia que se podia passar a mão para o outro lado.

Competindo entre si pela atenção, compreensão e absolvição do leitor que interpelam de forma direta, estas três personagens tentarão esclarecer, e muitas vezes justificar, as suas ações, as suas escolhas, as suas relações e, inevitavelmente, o seu papel numa farsa maior e que nos concerne a todos:

A felicidade de uma pessoa é muitas vezes construída sobre a infelicidade de outra, o mundo é feito assim. É duro, e lamento profundamente.(...)Culpem lá quem inventou o universo, se querem culpar alguém. Mas não me culpem a mim.

Pisar calos, orquestrar derrotas, cobiçar felicidade, ambicionar mais dinheiro, trair amizades, subir no status, tudo é legítimo no jogo do amor, tudo vale quando entre aquele que deseja e o objeto do desejo se interpõe uma terceira parte:

Conseguem imaginar dor que eu senti? Não, é claro que não. Não se pode sentir a dor de outra pessoa, o problema é esse. É esse o problema do mundo. Se ao menos conseguíssemos aprender a sentir a dor dos outros...

Como é que tudo isto, tratado de forma tão pretensiosa consegue resultar numa leitura divertida (até certo ponto), compulsiva e viciante? Não sei. É um romance arriscado de todos os pontos de vista - e eu avanço, uma vez mais, que é um daqueles livros que se adoram ou odeiam. Não é fácil criar empatia com personagens tão hedonistas, egoístas e arrogantes; não é fácil ser transformado em participante da ação, ser intimado a todo o momento para expressar o que se pensa dos comportamentos destas personagens, ser insultado, e mesmo ridicularizado por elas. Todo o livro é um desafio ao nosso amor próprio e à nossa autoconfiança pois que nos põe constantemente em cheque como se, em vez de Stuart, Gillian e Oliver fossem um Miguel, uma Marta e um Artur os intervenientes neste triângulo amoroso...

O amor é só o que as pessoas querem que seja, a noção de valor que aceitam dar-lhe. Hoje em dia é considerado um bem de consumo por quase toda a gente. Por mim não. Acho que o amor está cotado artificialmente, acima do seu valor. Um dia destes, vai à bancarrota.

Enfim, Amor & C.ª é um livro sem uma designação específica, anda ali a rondar a tragicomédia e a análise psicológica, revela uma certa soberba por parte do autor (que não sei se é costumeira) e um conhecimento cultural diversificado que me agradou. Melhor mesmo só se a tradutora, que começa por ser uma simpática e facilitar todas as notas de rodapé necessárias ao leitor, não se cansasse de vez em quando e deixasse dezenas de páginas carregadas de expressões que não ocorrem ao menino Jesus sem qualquer tradução ou esclarecimento.

Se nos lembramos do passado com demasiada acuidade, queixamo-nos ainda mais do presente. Vejam o que me fizeram, fizeram-me ser assim, não tenho culpa. Deixem que vos corrija: provavelmente a culpa é vossa. E poupem-me os pormenores.
Profile Image for Ugnė.
601 reviews131 followers
May 2, 2018
Pagaliau gavau tai, ko ilgai buvau ieškojusi - perskaičiau kelias prisėdimais ir besimėgaudama. Pasakojimo intriga išlaikyta iki pat pabaigos ir tai be galo džiugino.
Profile Image for W.D. Clarke.
Author 3 books320 followers
December 30, 2019
JB here takes one of the oldest and most potentially cliché of subjects in a first-person-narrated three-p.o.v. love triangle, and executes it near*-perfectly, thus raising what might have been an otherwise merely diverting read up to where it not only probes the nature of modern relationships, but raises important existential questions along the way as well. Plus, Julian Barnes is so much in control of his sentences, which, when not coming out of the mouth of the over-educated and under-achieving snob and pedant Oliver are for the most part an understated delight.

With Oliver, however, Barnes' style goes full-on baroque, and it is indeed a marvel to behold. I do think that Oliver is up there with my favourite comic characters in fiction --Martin Amis's John Self (Money) Charles Dickens's Bounderby (Hard Times) being obvious rivals in the high-self-regarding-narcissist category (or the farcical version of what Conrad called "exalted egoism" in Lord Jim. Here is Oliver on how he found fault at the age of sixteen with how "Old Bastards" (or "OBs") like his own father originally came to signed off on Letters to the Editor with a "Yours, &c.":
The thing I remember from the Letters Page in those antique days was the way the OBs sign off. There was Yours faithfully, Yours sincerely, and I have the honour to be, sir, your obedient servant. But the ones I always looked for – and which I took to be the true sign of an Old Bastard – simply ended like this: Yours etc. And then the newspaper drew even more attention to the sign-off by printing it: Yours &c.

Yours &c. I used to muse about that. What did it mean? Where did it come from? I imagined some bespatted captain of industry dictating his OB’s views to his secretary for transmission to the Newspaper of Record which he doubtless referred to with jocund familiarity as ‘The Thunderer’. When his oratorical belch was complete, he would say, ‘Yours etc,’ which Miss ffffffolkes would automatically transcribe into, ‘I have the honour to be, sir, one of the distinguished Old Bastards who could send you the label off a tin of pilchards and you would still print it above this my name,’ or whatever, and then it would be, ‘Despatch this instanter to The Thunderer, Miss ffffffolkes.’

But one day Miss ffffffolkes was away giving a handjob to the Archbishop of York, so they sent a temp. And the temp wrote down Yours, etc, just as she heard it and The Times reckoned the OB captain of industry a very gusher of wit, but decided to add their own little rococo touch by compacting it further to &c , wherepon other OBs followed the bespatted lead of the captain of industry, who claimed all the credit for himself. There we have it: Yours &c .

Whereupon, as an ardent damp-ear of sixteen, I took to the parodic sign-off: Love, &c. Not all my correspondents unfailingly seized the reference, I regret to say. One demoiselle hastened her own de-accessioning from the museum of my heart by informing me with hauteur that use of the word etc., whether in oral communication or in carven prose, was common and vulgar. To which I replied, first, that ‘the word’ et cetera was not one but two words, and that the only common and vulgar thing about my letter – given the identity of its recipient – was affixing to it the word that preceded etc. Alack, she didn’t respond to this observation with the Buddhistic serenity one might have hoped.

Love, etc. The proposition is simple. The world divides into two categories: those who believe that the purpose, the function, the bass pedal and principal melody of life is love, and that everything else – everything else – is merely an etc.; and those, those unhappy many, who believe primarily in the etc. of life, for whom love, however agreeable, is but a passing flurry of youth, the pattering prelude to nappy-duty, but not something as solid, steadfast and reliable as, say, home decoration. This is the only division between people that counts.
Just brilliant, how he moves from irrational, hypertrophic hatred for little tics of his enemy-father's to completely unwarranted but hilarious etymological speculations—to unflattering self-revelation, and finally to semi-profound philosophical taxonomy. Oliver does this kind of thing all the time, and I think I shall re-read the book for his spit-take-inducing riffs alone. (Also very curious to see if his bloviating wit and romantic narcissism survive ten years' worth of aging intact, in the sequel, aptly titled Love, Etc.!

*I am not sure that Gillian, the woman who is loved by the two men (childhood friends Stuart and Oliver) in the novel is quite as strong (in the first two-thirds of the story, at least) as she should be. She is the most truculent of the trio--and though she declares this to be a deliberate choice, it feels a bit of a cop-out, and I am not sure we ever learn enough of her motivations, opaque though they may be to Gillian herself.
Profile Image for Biljana.
374 reviews89 followers
March 31, 2024
Izreku da troje ponekad, zaista, predstavlja gomilu dočarao nam je Džulijan Barns u romanu Troje.

Napisan u formi ispovijesti koje glavni likovi pričaju nepoznatoj publici, ovo djelo je priča o preljubi.Ili je, ipak, priča o prijateljstvu i svemu onome što ono nije. Ili priča o ljubavi, koja to, veoma zasigurno nije.

Ekstrovert, introvert i jedna žena kao tačka razdora, okosnica su radnje u koju čitalac viri kao kroz ključaonicu, čitajući o intimi troje ljudi, odnosima i okolnostima koje su ih vodile ka postupcima koji će im obilježiti živote.

Iako je tema preljube za njene učesnike stresna, a za publiku zanimljiva na nivou dobrog trača, Barns je uspio da u nju utka posebnu duhovitost, koja ovom romanu daje šarm zbog kojeg je i nakon trideset i kusur godina aktuelan.
Profile Image for Archit.
825 reviews3,204 followers
July 29, 2017
Talking it Over is one of the best works of Julian Barnes.

Told in 3 perspectives of the protagonists, I was baffled, perplexed and confused, as to where my alliances lie. Whose side I was rooting for? Who was the hero for me and who was the victim?

This love triangle story was unique and highly amusing.

I just realized that it has a second installment. That sounds like fun!

Recommended to Julian Barnes fans.
Profile Image for Grazia.
461 reviews200 followers
August 28, 2017
Non mi è piaciuto!

Interessante il coro alterno delle voci, quasi "personaggi in cerca di autore"... che prendono il controllo sulla narrazione (Val che si intromette nella narrazione quasi vivesse di vita propria)

Qualche spunto divertente, ma tutto sommato prolisso e un po' annoiante.

Una visione del matriomonio e dell'amicizia molto molto cinica e anche triste!
Profile Image for Erika Westman.
47 reviews2 followers
July 3, 2012
This is the first Julian Barnes I've read. One word comes to mind to describe his writing and that is "control". How can I explain that more? There are no extra words, ideas, paragraphs, characters, or scenes in his book. Every word is tightly woven into the story. All writers aspire to achieve that. Julian Barnes' Talking It Over is an excellent and rare example of that kind of control. I get the sense that Barnes knows exactly what he wants to say and gets straight to the business of saying it, even though I'm sure the process of writing it down is more complicated than that.
The book is a page turner. Not predictable drugstore pulp, because the tone of the book is more sophisticated than that. But Barnes is a master of plot, giving enough away to make you wonder why, and holding enough back to keep you wondering how? I'd like to know if he gets into his plot in detail before beginning to write, or if he reigns in his creations while editing.
Another commendation, his characters are interesting right off the bat. I especially liked Oliver (though I'd loathe him if I knew him in the real world). Barnes uses the different characters' voices in just the right doses, allowing them to go on at length to develop the plot at times, and giving them just a few lines to sprinkle in tension at others. The voices bounce off each other to show the same stories from their various points of view, and it's great fun for the reader to anticipate what each of their different stories will be.
Profile Image for Vanja Šušnjar Čanković.
325 reviews128 followers
October 2, 2023
Mnogo volim Barnsa čak i kad je dosadnjikav, tako da mi je teško biti objektivna kad je njegovo pisanje u pitanju (tako da je konačna ocjena možda malo precijenjena). Troje je priča o ljubavnom trouglu, preljubi, onom zamršenom, mračnom, pomalo trulom "mesu" (unutar) prijateljskih odnosa,.. Možda pomalo pretenciozna, vrlo zanimljive strukture, priču iz svoje perspektive priča svaki protagonista i iako se Barns dokazuje kao uspješan majstor i takve tehnike, na momente se stiče utisak da se Stjuartov i Oliverov glas miješaju, a možda je to i svjesno, kao produkt njihove istorije i "bliskosti". Barns je svejedno originalan kao uvijek i zahvaljujući njegovom nevjerovatnom crnom humoru može mu se oprostiti i "pasivni" britanski elitizam u izražavanju. 😊 Osim toga, novo Geopoetikino crveno ruho mu stvarno lijepo stoji! Radujem se novim starim izdanjima.
Profile Image for Aslıhan Çelik Tufan.
648 reviews197 followers
November 16, 2020
Bu denli sıradan ve bilindik bir hikayenin ustalıkla sıkmadan ve espri dolu anlatılması çok çok güzel.
Bir aşk üçgeni hikayesi gibi dursa da kadın erkek ilişkileri, dostluk ve aile bağları üzerine Şahane bir okuma.
Herkesin nazarından olaylara bakabildiğiniz adeta kanepelerinde konuk oluyor kah sigara ikramlarını kah esprilerini kah buhranlarını okuyoruz.
Oliver, Gillian ve Stuart tan hangisinin tarafında olduğum bana kalsın diyeyim ve tavsiye edeyim.
Keyifli okumalar!
Profile Image for Ana.
808 reviews693 followers
March 29, 2014
well, this was a surprise. this book and I started off with the wrong foot, and for the first 60 - 70 pages i kept wondering if i'm going to have to do the unthinkable and give a bad opinion on a Barnes book. but then the universe sweated off this problem and made this work take the road of well - written literature. the three star rating might, therefore, come as a surprise, but don't be fooled - the rating system on GR is just a gimmick we play with, not a thing you should take for granted.

this is not and will never be my favorite Barnes work, but it keeps in with his writing fashion and draws the reader in with his typical dry humour. ( brits! can you do anything about it? ) but, just as his works might be taken as a way to pass time between other works, a conscious reader can see in it much more than your average wife-on-vacation.

as with all his works, his characters are meant to represent something. there is not one useless personae in all that i've read by him. because, see, there are characters, and there are your parents, or your friends, or your boyfriend that you find in some works and think: well, what would X do in this situation, because they sure are alike? many of Barnes' people reminded me of someone that i know or i knew of and it's more than a pleasure to intertwine these two worlds, as you rarely get to do that and is, truly, one of the testimonies for very good writing.

i have to say that my three star rating is a border decision, as it could be a 3.5 and it would in reality be a 4 .... if it wouldn't have been for that slow start. i just can't get over it - unforgivable sin!

all is good, though - my opinion on julian barnes' writing hasn't suffered any changes and my enthusiasm for any of his books hasn't been chipped.

phew, that could've been a close one.
Profile Image for Ubik 2.0.
1,005 reviews279 followers
January 14, 2019
triangolo

Reduce da esperienze di lettura particolarmente positive (“Il senso di una fine” e “L’unica storia”) ho voluto esplorare la bibliografia precedente di Julian Barnes, sperando di avere trovato un altro autore da inserire nei futuri programmi di lettura, ma da questo romanzo sono rimasto molto deluso.

O la scelta è sfortunatamente caduta su un flop, oppure l’evoluzione del miglior Barnes è recente (Amore, ecc. è di quasi un ventennio precedente); comunque sia, non sono riuscito a trovare particolari motivi di interesse in questo romanzetto che presenta l’unica (molto relativa…) nota di originalità nella struttura, dove si alternano le voci di tre personaggi che narrano in prima persona la vicenda dalla rispettiva angolazione, sempre quei tre, con lo sporadico e poco significativo intervento di qualche comprimario.

Il guaio è che la “vicenda” in questione, oggetto dell’analisi e della narrazione polifonica, si riduce al più classico e scontato triangolo (lui, lei e il migliore amico di lui) che evolve in assenza di qualunque elemento di imprevedibilità e disturbo, descritto da tre personalità scarsamente interessanti e, soprattutto nei due personaggi maschili, eccessivamente caratterizzate fino a sfiorare talora la parodia, cosa che non consente di prendere sul serio le pene d’amore dei suddetti.

Risultato piatto dunque, in cui uno dei punti di forza di Barnes, almeno nei due bei romanzi contemporanei citati, e cioè la messa in discussione dell’oggettività, si disperde in lamentose, prolisse e petulanti esposizioni di punti di vista, ovviamente strabici e divergenti come sempre accade nei confronti dello svolgersi degli eventi… e dell’esistenza stessa di chiunque, vista da dentro o da fuori.
Profile Image for Esra M..
64 reviews54 followers
May 4, 2016
Herkesin kendi ağzından anlattığı üçlü bir aşkın öyküsünü okuyoruz kitapta. Olayların bu şekilde aktarılması kuşkusuz kişileri daha net anlamamızı sağlıyor ancak bu anlatım tarzı bana duyguları aktarmada kestirme bir yol gibi geliyor. Aşkın başlangıcı, zamanla değişimi ve kişileri değiştirmesi, var olan duruma göre aşka ve karşı tarafa bakış açısının farklılaşmasının taraflara iyi ya da kötü damgası vurulmadan aktarıldığı bir hikayeye tanık oluyoruz. Tanık oluyoruz çünkü kimi yerlerde okuyucuda bu serüvene dahil ediliyor. Ayrıca üç kahramanımızın dışında zaman zaman yan karakterlerin de kendi ağızlarından hikayeye katkıda bulunmaları anlatıma hareketlilik katıyor. "Bir Son Duygusu" kadar etkilenmesem de basit sözlerle karmaşık bir olayı bize aktarmasından dolayı bence okumaya değer bir kitap. Hepimizin kendine göre anlamlar yüklediği ama sonunda aynı kapıya çıkan aşka adanmış bu kitabı okuduktan sonra aklıma gelen şarkı ise "küçücük bir öykü bu, herkesin başından geçer" oluyor. Keyifli okumalar dilerim.
Profile Image for Argos.
1,161 reviews409 followers
December 6, 2019
Sevdiğimi söyleyemem, ilginç kurgusuna rağmen soğuk İngiliz mizah anlayışı beni sarmadı.
Profile Image for Jolanta (knygupė).
1,071 reviews223 followers
August 8, 2024
3,5*
Labai patiiko sumanymas - kalbinti visus tris pagrindinius veikėjus. Įdomu buvo skaityti jų to pačio laiko ar įvykių skirtingus matymus. Kaip kažkuriam iš veikėjų koks tai reikšmingas įvykis kitam - nevertas net paminėjimo, lyg net nepastebėtas. Iš trijulės man kliuvo Oliveris. Likau nesupratusi, kodėl autorius jį Stiuarto ir Džilianos fone taip ir paliko vaidinančiu rolę aktoriumi. Aš nesugebėjau patikėti kai kuriais jo ale nuoširdžiais pakalbėjimais/pamintijimais. Man jis visiškai neatsivėrė.

Nežinau šio romano rašymo aplinkybių, bet man pasirodė keistas rusiškų žodių ir išsireiškimų prikaišiojimas tekste. Na, neturėjo jie man jokios prasmės.

Ir dar. Viršelis - omg. Peržiūrėjau goodreadse visus romano leidimus ir mūsiškis (Zigmanto Butaučio darbas) man atrodo vienas iš prasčiausių.
Profile Image for Cristina Boncea.
Author 6 books729 followers
February 10, 2017
Recunosc că mă așteptam la ceva puțin mai erotic atunci când am văzut titlul însă conținutul cărții a fost cel puțin la fel de inspirator.

Povestea poate fi spusă într-o frază simplă: există un el și o ea și un al treilea intervine, după care ea schimbă taberele. Perspectivele expuse de fiecare personaj în parte sunt deosebit de interesante, puse în opoziție.

Haideți să încep cu ce nu mi-a plăcut. Nu am văzut prea tare rostul personajului Val, o tipă pusă pe teorii conspiratoare, menită să ne facă să râdem; în contextul plin de seriozitate al scenelor, în acel punct culminant, mi s-a părut destul de nepotrivit să se mențină această urmă de suspans cu un personaj episodic, cu rapiditate redus la tăcere de către cei doi zmei ai poveștii.

Îi avem așadar pe Stuart și Oliver, doi prieteni din perioada școlii, care se îndrăgostesc treptat de aceeași femeie - Gillian. Stuart se căsătorește primul cu ea, însă el reprezintă tipul bancherului calculat, o persoană foarte pragmatică însă lipsită de încredere în sine, care nu o poate vedea pe soția sa în mai multe nuanțe, pe când Oliver este chiar opusul. El e un proaspăt șomer plin de viziuni, cu o vastă cultură artistică, un snob foarte amuzant, căruia îi place să fie în centrul atenției - astfel reușește să o cucerească pe Gillian, legându-se de munca sa de restauratoare de tablouri, adorând-o și nerenunțând la obsesia sa pentru ea. Gillian este astfel pusă în fața unei decizii, între cei doi bărbați, iar motivațiile ei sunt cele care fac toată povestea...

Avem mai multe cazuri diferite de relații eșuate și adulter în carte, ce se leagă foarte elegant între ele. Ideea e că argumentul principal este "asta e, n-ai ce să faci, nu te poți opune dragostei". La polul opus ajunge să fie Stuart, cu inima frântă și încărcat de dorința de răzbunare, care conchide că dragostea este exact precum piața monetară, că este o iluzie, la fel ca banii: aceștia au o valoare doar fiindcă toată lumea e de acord, iar iubirea este supraestimată. Stuart ajunge de asemenea să se lanseze într-o comparație dintre comunism și democrație, susținând că ambele susțin materialismul iar toți oamenii sunt fie călugări budiști, fie materialiști, în cazul acesta.

Frumusețea cărții nu constă în poveste în sine, deși are un final tare simpatic și caraghios, ci în filosofia din spatele deciziilor luate de personaje. Niciunul nu încearcă să-și nege faptele sau sentimentele, e mai degrabă vorba de acceptare și gestionare. Mi-a plăcut faptul că fiecare personaj duce mai departe povestea adăugând propria sa perspectivă, raportându-se în mod diferit la întâmplări.

E de menționat faptul că Oliver este un personaj foarte bine conturat, construit pe un tipar anume, greu de uitat. L-aș putea numi idealist, dacă la baza acestui lucru nu s-ar afla de fapt o ființă umană destul de patetică și neputincioasă, condusă pur de partea sa afectivă. Îmi pare că la finalul romanului autorul ne lasă pe noi să decidem cu ce suntem de acord și cu ce nu, ce viziune preferăm să avem, dar nu asupra întâmplărilor din carte ci asupra dragostei în general. "Trois" e o denumire foarte potrivită, căci tema principală este adulterul și efectele sale într-un cuplu. Trecuți printr-o astfel de experiență, toți oamenii merg în direcții diferite.

Deși nu este ce mă așteptam a fi, referitor la temă, am descoperit că Barnes este cu adevărat un autor demn de luat în calcul, cu un stil de scriere foarte plăcut și concepte interesante, prezentate într-un mod ingenuu în acest roman. Recomand celor care caută o lectură haioasă, dar care să le dea în acealași timp de gândit!
Profile Image for Justė.
410 reviews130 followers
September 8, 2019
apklausa be(?) nusikaltimo

Po pirmosios pažinties su Julian Barnes, kuri vyko skaitant ‘Flobero papūgą’ šio autoriaus šiek tiek privengiau. Knyga buvo visai įdomi ir stebino savo keistomis formomis, bet kartu man tų keistų formų moderniojoje literatūroje dažnai būna per daug. Paradoksalu, kai būtent ir ‘Kalbant atvirai’ mane pritraukė savo keistu pasakojimo būdu.

O tas būdas, tai trijų pagrindinių ir kelių retai pasitaikančių pašalinių veikėjų pasakojimas tiesiogiai skaitytojui, apie tai kas įvyko. Skamba iš pirmo žvilgsnio gal ir ne taip ypatingai, bet tas kalbėjimas nėra tiesiog trijų perspektyvų pasakojimas. Kiekvienas veikėjas žino, kad ir kitas pasakoja, kartais pataiso, ką mano, kad kitas pasakė blogai, vyksta ir interackcija su skaitytoju, vis ko nors retoriškai jo paklausiant ir panašiai. Lyg vyktų kažkokia apklausa policijoje ar kažkas panašaus.

Tiesa, ką tie veikėjai pasakoja, nėra taip ‘entertaining’ kaip būtų, jei vyktų kažkoks detektyvas. Iš tiesų, tai tie trys pagrindiniai veikėjai dalyvauja labai savotiškame meilės trikampyje, bet jis labiau atskleidžiamas ne kaip įtraukiantis veiksmo ir nesusipratimų kupinas pasakojimas, bet labiau iš skirtingo požiūrio kampo ir gilesnės analizės perspektyvos. Tiesa, palyginus su ‘Flobero papūga’ man daug įdomesnė ir konceptualesnė istorija pasirodė.

Pasakojimas, jo atskleidimas ir visa forma tikrai verti dėmesio - moralas paslėptas giliai, pasakojimas jeigu ir nėra labai įtraukiantis, visgi skatina sužinoti, kas ir kaip. Didžiausia bėda man su šita knyga buvo ta, kad aš absoliučiai nekenčiau veikėjų. Bet tai turbūt iš romano perspektyvas irgi geras dalykas. Suskaičiau, visai patiko, bet iš kojų išvertė.
Profile Image for Edita.
1,537 reviews537 followers
March 2, 2019
If you remember your past too well you start blaming your present for it.
*
‘I’ve only felt alive since I met you. Now I’ll have to go back to being dead again.
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[...] as you go on living with someone, you slowly lose the power to make them happy, while your capacity to hurt them remains undiminished. And vice versa, of course.
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But one only has a duty to be optimistic in the eyes of others, not for oneself.
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There are certain truths which you can live with if they have been demonstrated to you only once. That way they do not oppress you, there is room for an interrogation mark beside them. But if such a truth is demonstrated twice, it will oppress and suffocate. I could not bear for this to be true, twice true. And so I keep my distance from that truth,


Profile Image for Юра Мельник.
320 reviews34 followers
December 19, 2021
Цілком така вудіаленівська трагікомедія про щасливо-нещасливе подружньо-неподружнє ЖИТТЯ.
Profile Image for Konserve Ruhlar.
287 reviews180 followers
March 25, 2016
Farklı bir teknikle üç kişiden ayrı ayrı dinlediğimiz bir aşkı anlatıyor Seni Sevmiyorum. Söz konusu Julian Barnes olunca kitap da elbette basit bir aşk hikayesini anlatıyor olamazdı. Karakterlerin birbirlerinden etkileşimleri ve ortaya çıkan sonuçlar üzerine bir hikayesi var romanın. Gill, Stuart ve Oliver'i tanıdıkça ilk başlarda onlar hakkında düşündüklerimiz epey değişiyor, ya da şöyle demeli; onları daha iyi anlıyoruz. Belki Aşk'ı da daha iyi anlıyoruz. Üzerine düşünüyoruz. Hakkında şiirler romanlar yazılan, göklere çıkartılan, kimilerimizin hayatında en önemli yere koyduğu aşk nedir?

Julian Barnes bizi sıkmadan son derece güçlü ve esprili bir dille anlatmış hikayeyi. Üç ana katakteri dışardan gözlemleme olanığı bile sunmuş. Onların birbirleri hakkında anlattıklarına, sürpriz karakterlerin görüşleri ile katkı yapmış. Bazen bir tiyatro oyunu izliyor hissine kapıldım. Anlatım tarzı bunun baş nedeni. Önce garip geldi, yorucu olacağını düşündüm. Her karakter konuşmadan önce onun adı var paragraf başında. O anlatıyor sonra kürsüyü diğerine bırakıyor. Ama geçişlerde hiç zorluk yaşamadım. Ayak uydurmak kolay oldu okurken. En zevkli yanı bu konuşmalara okuyucuyu da dahil etmeleri.

Romanda tek rahatsız edici ve hatta yorucu kısım Oliver'in konuşmalarına sık sık fransızca sözcük ve cümleler eklemesiydi. Onların anlamına bakmadan temiz ve anlaşılır bir okuma olmayacağından sık sık ara verip devam etmek gerekti. Bir iki tane olsa neyse ama her konuşmasında vardı.

Julian Barnes'i Bir Son Duygusu ile tanıdım. Seni Sevmiyorum da onun kadar iyi bir romandı. Farklı tarzda, oldukça usta bir teknikle yazılmış, olaydan çok karakterlerin ön plana çıktığı bir roman.
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