Template:Did you know nominations/Colin Stubs

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Styyx (talk) 20:58, 1 August 2022 (UTC)

Colin Stubs

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• ... that Colin Stubs utilized the prize money from his first international tennis title towards purchasing an old Volkswagen to travel around Europe? Source: Tennis Australia; Australian Financial Review
  • ALT1: ... that Colin Stubs spent four years "talking to international tennis players on the phone and dispensing headache pills" to the public? Source: Australian Financial Review
  • Reviewed: Canal (garden history)
  • Comment: Eligible per Rule 1d, because it is only appeared in the "Recent Deaths" section of ITN and not as a bold link.

5x expanded by Bloom6132 (talk). Self-nominated at 22:25, 18 July 2022 (UTC).

• In progress... Girth Summit _(blether) 12:58, 19 July 2022 (UTC)
  • Article has been expanded by 5x within the last week.
  • There is no copyvio that I can detect - Earwig picks up on a direct quote, otherwise it's just a few scraps of sentences.
  • The article is well written, neutrally phrased, and cited to reliable sources.
  • The main hook is fine in terms of length and being cited, and it is interesting, but I feel that it's phrased a little awkwardly (at least to my ear). I'd suggest a slight rewording, along the lines of "... that Colin Stubs used the prize money from his first international tennis title to help him buy an old Volkswagen to travel around Europe?" or "... that Colin Stubs spent the prize money from his first international tennis title on an old Volkswagen to travel around Europe?"
  • It would be nice if we were able to confirm the type of VW. I assume it was a Volkswagen Type 2 (VW combi), but the sources used at present don't specify.
  • Alt1 is fine, but I think the first hook would be the better choice, if the wording were tweaked.
  • QPQ is done.
• This will be ready to roll once the wording of the hook is tweaked. Girth Summit _(blether) 13:17, 19 July 2022 (UTC)

• @Girth Summit: thanks for the review! I'll go with the second rewording you suggested:

• ALT0a: ... that Colin Stubs spent the prize money from his first international tennis title on an old Volkswagen to travel around Europe?

Hope you can have another look at it. —Bloom6132 (talk) 13:26, 19 July 2022 (UTC)

No worries. Good to go based on ALT0a directly above. Girth Summit _(blether) 13:28, 19 July 2022 (UTC)