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Talk:What Lies Below (Fringe)/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewing

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Queenieacoustic (talk) 09:24, 16 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I will review this article later today or tomorrow. Queenieacoustic (talk) 09:24, 16 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

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Plot

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  1. "...and may be 75,000 years old that was responsible for wiping out the Ice Age mammals." Awkwardely worded. You can replace "that was" with "and," for example.
  2. "a CDC official makes the order for the army to prepare for a "level six eradication" because they still do not know how to contain it." "makes the order for" should simply be replaced with "orders," and put a comma after "eradication."
  3. "clearly revealing he is infected." Type "that" after "revealing."
  4. "Walter becomes more and more distressed as he fears losing his son again," Is Peter Walters' son? If so, this should be established earlier, conceivably the first time the characters are mentioned.
  5. "While inside Peter attacks her," Add a comma after "inside."
  6. "Peter and everyone is successfully cured." Add "else" after "everyone."

Production

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  1. "Jasika Nicole was pleased that the writers decided to let her character Astrid Farnsworth discover Walter's secret," Since Jasika Nicole and Astrid Farnsworth have already been mentioned by full name once, you only need to mention them by their last names at all other times.

Reception

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Ratings
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  1. "steady but stagnant ratings", Put the comma before the second quotation mark.
Reviews
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  1. "A.V. Club" should be "The A.V. Club."
  2. "an episode of the show that started out utterly predictably, continued along an utterly predictable path and yet somehow got fairly enjoyable by the end just through sheer force of will on the part of the cast". Put the punctuation before the second quotation mark.
  3. "much of the quintessential storytelling elements that, once upon a time, made this one of the best shows on TV". Same as above.
  4. Since MTV.com is not a magazine, it should not be italicized.
  5. "while not quite as strong as when the mythology is in full gear, "What Lies Below" was nonetheless a compelling hour of television." Since "What Lies Below" is in a quote, it should use single quotation marks (').
Awards and nominations
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While there's nothing wrong in this section, I think it would be interesting to know whether the episode won the award or not! It's not necessary though, so if you don't want it in, you don't have to.

In conclusion

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This article looks very good overall. There's mostly just some minor things that need to be fixed in order for it to pass. On hold. Queenieacoustic (talk) 16:20, 16 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for the review. I made most of your suggested changes, except for a few punctuation/quotation mark issues (which I verified with the corresponding reference). I kept the full name of Jasika Nicole, but removed her character name (I thought wikilinking her name again wouldn't hurt, as it is largely buried in the plot section). As always, thanks for catching the minor grammar mistakes that I seem to increasingly keep missing. :) Ruby2010 comment! 05:10, 17 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Don't worry about it! When the biggest mistake I can find is that you forgot a comma or whatnot, you should know that you've written an excellent article. Pass! Queenieacoustic (talk) 09:46, 17 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks :) Ruby2010 comment! 15:01, 17 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]
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