Talk:Teraupo'o/GA1

Latest comment: 4 years ago by KAVEBEAR in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Hog Farm (talk · contribs) 23:30, 6 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

Criteria

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1. Prose  Pass

2. Verifiability  Pass

3. Depth of Coverage  Pass

4. Neutral  Pass

5. Stable  Pass

6. Illustrations  Pass

7. Miscellaneous  Pass

Comments

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1.

  • "decade long" - Should this be hypenated?
  • Changed.
  • Any way we could get a few more sentences in the lead to beef it up? The lead could do a bit better job summarizing the entire article in this case. For instance, that he was a "chief of a minor lineage" could be added to the lead.
  • "He was born on c. 1855" - I don't think on is the best word here. You're born on a date, but since the date is unknown, it's just the year. Normally, you're born in or during a year.
  • Changed.
  • "in the Leeward Islands (Society Islands)" - This gives the implication that the Leeward Islands is an alternate name for the Society Islands when it's really just a part of the Societies. It would be better to use a piped link and then state that the Leewards are part of the Societies.
  • Changed. That was a odd one.
  • "tāvana" - Most of the other non-English words are italicized, but this one isn't. Is there a reason why?
  • Changed.
  • "1847 Convention" - Is this an alternate name for the Convention of 1847? If not, I don't think convention should be capitalized here.
  • Yes it is.
  • Done.
  • " the order of King Tamatoa VI to surrender to the French and build up a resistance force in 1887" - As it stands, this indicates that Tamatoa VI order to surrender to the French and also build up a resistance force. This seems a little contradictory and makes me wonder if it should be built instead of build. This would change the meaning to indicate that Tamatoa order the surrender, but Teraupo'o built a resistance force instead. Which is correct?
  • Changed.
  • " faterehau of Opoa" - The meaning of faterehau needs stated.
  • It is a name not a title.
  • Teraupiste is sometimes capitalized and sometimes not. This should be consistent.
  • Changed.
  • "supplied him arms and fund" - "supplied him with arms and funds" is a possibility for a smoother reading. Regardless, funds should probably be in the plural.
  • Changed.
  • "Resident Frederick Moss" - Is there a reason Resident is capitalized? Is this a title?
  • It is a title.
  • "the 1878 Kanak in New Caledonia" - Calling out a specific year in this case makes it sound like an event, but Kanak is a people group. Was it a rebellion? If so, you can call it the 1878 Kanak rebellion if that's accurate.
  • Typo when pipelinking in the past.
  • "The casualty of the six-week campaign was nearly fifty deaths mainly on the side of the Raiateans." - This isn't really grammatical. Casualty is usually used to refer to the loss of a single person.
  • Changed.

2.

  • The Newbury references should be in chronological order of publication
  • Is that the policy? I've been arranging them alphabetically by titles.
  • That's work then. I've always seen it in chronological order, but looking through policy the only requirement is that last names are alphabetized.

3.

  • " in accordance with the Convention of 1847" - Can we get a brief explanation of what the Convention of 1847 guaranteed?
  • "but the kingdoms of the Leeward Islands including Raiatea-Tahaa were ensured independence by France and Great Britain under the Jarnac Convention or the Anglo-French Convention of 1847" - It is in the article. Does it need more context?
  • That's fine
  • The article is in the category Category:Deaths from Spanish flu. If this is accurate, it should be specified in the article. If not, go ahead and take it out of that category, although categorization isn't a GA requirement.
  • "He died at Vaiaau on 23 December 1918, at the height of the Spanish flu epidemic." It is in the article. There isn't much details beyond that.
  • Yeah, if we don't know for sure that he died of the flu, it shouldn't be included.
  • Oh, okay. I was misinterpreting what the article was said - I thought it was saying that he only died during, the epidemic. Also, if you feel like that's the most that can be done without making the lead WP:UNDUE, that's fine. Hog Farm (talk) 15:04, 8 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

4.

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6.

7.

  • Would it be appropriate the add a person infobox to this article?
  • Done.

Placing on hold. Hog Farm (talk) 00:20, 8 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

@Hog Farm: Expanded the lead. KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:37, 10 April 2020 (UTC)Reply
Promoting Hog Farm (talk) 15:07, 10 April 2020 (UTC)Reply

@Hog Farm: Thanks. Would want to take a crack at reviewing Tuarii? KAVEBEAR (talk) 05:13, 14 April 2020 (UTC)Reply