Talk:The Last Temptation of Homer/GA1
GA Review
[edit]Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Good job with this. It shouldn't take long to take care of my suggestions...
From Intro:
Can you mention in here that Michelle Pfeiffer was the guest star, and maybe a mention about how acclaimed her performance was.
From Plot:
"...the more Homer begins to fear that there may be more fusion at the hotel than back at the plant." This appears to be a pun and, not to be a stick in the mud, isn't very encyclopedic. Could you reword it?Can you mention in this section that Marge is sick at and unattractive at home? It's a significant factor in the story.
From Production:
I think the amount of single words in "quotes" was a bit overdone in this section. Some of them are appropriate, but others can just as easily be dropped. I took the liberty of dropping a few, so if you could just check and make sure you're OK with the changes, let me know.
Note: I made some grammatical changes in the article, mostly minor stuff, but please take a look. Also, for future reference, this might be a style thing, but avoid using the word "that" so often. 90% of the time, you can just as easily drop the word and the meaning of the sentence remains the same. Take a look at the sentences where I removed the word.
Very nice job! --Hunter Kahn (talk) 02:00, 16 February 2009 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review! I think I have addressed all of your concerns. :) TheLeftorium 10:21, 16 February 2009 (UTC)
I think it fits the Good Article criteria now. Nice work! --Hunter Kahn (talk) 21:52, 16 February 2009 (UTC)