Talk:Jungle Cruise (film)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Some Dude From North Carolina (talk · contribs) 02:33, 20 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Hey, I'm going to be reviewing this article. Expect comments by the end of the week. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 02:33, 20 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead

Add WP:ALT text to the infobox's image.

Done

John Requa is not credited for the screenplay.

Maybe an anonymous Special:Diff/1040144389

Avoid having citations in the infobox.

Fixed

Avoid having citations in the lead.

Fixed

"... following the success of Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl the year prior" – this is not mentioned in the body

Fixed

Add a WP:GEOCOMMA after "Atlanta, Georgia".

Fixed

Plot and cast

Some notes are sourced and others are not. Why?

Fixed

Several of these notes should also state that they are translations.

Fixed

"La Luna Rota" actually means "The Broken Moon".

Fixed

"the trio depart" → "the trio departs" (American English)

Fixed

Why is "cannibal" in quotes?

Fixed

"A tribe in the Amazon which guards the Tree" – why is this a note and not part of the summary?

Fixed

"Tears of the Moon, a mythical tree whose flowers cure illness, heal injuries, and lift curses" – why is this also a note and not part of the summary?

Fixed

"Frank's puns are inspired from the skipper's lines on the original theme park ride." – This should be mentioned in the body of the article, not a note.

Fixed

"Boat is" → "The boat is".

Fixed

his interest lies "elsewhere" – WP:EASTEREGG

Fixed

"A somewhat foppish snob who adheres to proper etiquette and prefers wearing three-piece suits." – why the sudden stop?

Fixed

"Rosita" name is → The name "Rosita" is

Fixed

"at the Disneyland" → "at Disneyland"

Fixed

Ben Jenkin is not mentioned in this article.

Fixed

"Dani Rovira, Quim Gutiérrez, and Dan Dargan Carter portray Aguirre's fellow conquistadors: Sancho, who is covered in honey and bees, Melchor, who is made out of mud with frogs, and Gonzalo, who is composed of roots and tree branches." – source?

Fixed

"mud with frogs" – reword

Fixed

Overall, avoid having so many notes in these sections and integrate them into the actual article.
"As depicted in the film, Lágrimas de Cristal (Tears of the Moon) is a mythical Tree hidden in the La Luna Rota (The Broken Moon) Waterfall. A brokenhearted warrior has shot his arrow to make the moon cry, which has grown the Tree. The arrowhead artifact is protected by the tribal chief's daughter in 1556 away from the jungle. It is later acquired by Dr. Albert Falls, and is kept in London, from where Lily steals it in 1916." – this still feels wrong as a note.

Check please

Looks good. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 17:05, 29 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Production and music

I think the Disney press kit might have more information not currently mentioned in the article.

Working

Aside of the pdf, just found this website having brief info regarding the Post Production. Can the section be expanded from here? Other refs include [1] [2]. Will work on it this weekend because extracting and summarizing needs time... M. Billoo 13:24, 25 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@M.Billoo2000: Great expansion! Please send me a message when you're done. Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 17:05, 29 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@Some Dude From North Carolina: check please.

M. Billoo 17:32, 30 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

September update

"inspired by the theme park attraction of the same name" – this link seems misleading. Consider "inspired by the theme park attraction of the same name".
Move the reference after "the theme park attraction of the same name" to the end of the sentence it is in.
Remove the comma after "written by Goldstein and Norville".
"and the film produced by John Davis and John Fox" – reword
"announced in April 2017 to co-produce" → "announced in April 2017 that he would co-produce"
"Before casting Falcón, the Trader Sam, inspired by a character at the theme park who is originally a male, was still under decision whether to be portrayed by a male or a female in the film." → "Before Falcón was cast as the Trader Sam, a role inspired by a character at the theme park who is originally a male, it was being discussed whether the role would be portrayed by a male or a female in the film."
"shoot spell" – what's that?
Most of #Marketing is not about marketing. Per WP:TRAILER, do not include events like a "surprise visit at Disneyland." The sentence "Johnson shared that the film pays homage to The African Queen, Romancing the Stone and Indiana Jones" should have a serial comma. It should also be moved, alongside the second paragraph, to a different section (possibly in #Production or in #Cast).
In #Music, the line "The soundtrack album was released on July 30, 2021" is unsourced.
The track listing does not appear to be necessary (see WP:FILMSCORE).

@Some Dude From North Carolina:

Done and

Fixed all

M. Billoo 03:07, 3 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Release, reception, and future

Add a WP:DATECOMMA after July 30, 2021.
Add a WP:DATECOMMA after July 29, 2021.
Add a WP:DATECOMMA after October 11, 2019.
Add "the" before "COVID-19 delta variant".
Updated the film's box office numbers.
"needs to gross around $500 million" → "needed to gross around $500 million"
Add a comma after both uses of "its second weekend".
"with some noting the film managed to finish above projections while some" → "with some noting the film managed to finish above projections while others"
"$9.1 million" was updated by Deadline Hollywood to simply "$9 million"
"France ($1.7 million)" → "France ($1.6 million)" (updated)
South Korea and North Korea are put together under a single category. So change "South Korea ($1.2 million)" to "Korea ($1.2 million)", "47 countries" to "47 markets", and "49 countries" to "49 markets".
Update the title for the reference after The Suicide Squad.
See WP:RECEPTION for how to summarize a film's reception (see Old as an example).
"the release weekend of the Jungle Cruise" → "the release weekend of Jungle Cruise"

Done and Fixed all; but kindly help for the Reception :(

The usage of quotes has been reduced so it looks good now :) Some Dude From North Carolina (talk) 22:53, 2 September 2021 (UTC)[reply]

References

Please avoid having extensions like ".com" in the "website" parameters.
Also replace all "publisher" parameters with "website" per MOS:ITALICS.
Use this template to cite Box Office Mojo.
Deadline → Deadline Hollywood
"(EXCLUSIVE)" → "(Exclusive)" (WP:ALLCAPS)
Wikipedia has listed Inquisitr as an unreliable source.

Done and

Fixed all

Progress

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()

3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()

Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed